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Some new Socials

Broke-ass Social Scene

tl:dr: I have new Mastadon and post accounts

I really liked twitter. I followed a lot of comedians so my feed was full of jokes and funny takes on current events. I also enjoyed following accounts that were experts on various subjects, accounts from bands I liked (it’s how I found out about the Local H show here in NYC the other week), and official accounts like NASA. Accounts like We Rate Dogs gave me a little boost of happy every day.

And sure, there were things about twitter that sucked. Sometimes my feed was an endless scroll of complaints and lectures about the same subjects. Or people loudly arguing a point I agreed with as if I were on the other side of the debate. And there were trolls, there are always trolls. They can be nasty and legitimately dangerous when they get going, especially to women and people of color. Thankfully I avoided the worst of that.

And the upside was fun. As a comedian, twitter was a great medium for joke writing. The 120, and then 240, character limit forced you to be concise and get to the joke as efficiently as possible. As a performer it was a great place to announce shows and post highlights from them. Interacting with other comedians and musicians helped build a sense of community without having to be in the same place or having to hang out until 2 am after shows.

When the Musk-man took over I knew there’d be changes and I waited to see what they’d be. If he were just another idiot on twitter sh*t posting alt-right memes and buying into conspiracy narratives that would be one thing, but this is ridiculous. A self-proclaimed “free speech absolutist” who capriciously bans reporters who cover him, exaggerating their coverage as an assassination threat while his own posts force his former executives into hiding from his troll army, is something I can’t tolerate. And the fact that the CEO of an electric car company AND a successful space launch company can tweet out anti-science, evidence-free opinions, coupled with the evidence that he makes decisions for the platform based on these ideas, clearly indicates it’s only going to get worse.

So I’m out.

If twitter finds new management I’ll think about going back, so I’ll leave my account open for the time being. Until then I’ve set up a mastodon account and one over at post. Mastodon feels the most like twitter so far, post doesn’t yet feel much like anything. I’m still on instagram too but holy cow, the amount of comedians posting clips of their sets is out of control. I’d unfollow you but some of you have cute pets!

Anyway, I’ll miss you guys on twitter but I hope to see you in other places.

Daily News prints my tweet!

Analog Retweet!

I just found out that the New York Daily News on Monday, January 27 printed a tweet of mine! Pretty sweet!

It was from the previous day when the Rangers played the Devils in an NHL hockey game at Yankee Stadium. Here’s the tweet:

And here it is in the Daily News the next day:


Special shout out to my friend Michele Carlo for saving me a copy!


Fave Tweets from 2010

2010 was my first full year of tweeting! There were some fun posts, some road pictures, and hopefully enough jokes to justify hitting the ‘refresh’ button every once in a while.

So, in case you missed them, or you think twitter is annoying (it can be) and you haven’t been following my feed, here are MY FAVORITE TWEETS FROM 2010!

Jan 9
RobPRocks enjoys the fact that whenever WE TV promotes an upcoming show they have to say “tonight, ennui.”

Jan 19
They say everything happens for a reason, and sometimes that reason is to piss you off.

Feb 4
FYI, they’re going to know you’re a Northerner when you ask for one collard green.

Feb 5
My check engine light really needs to be more specific. I checked the engine, it’s there.

Feb 22
I saw a cell tower that had fake branches on it to make it look like a tree. I played along and disguised my phone as a pine cone.

March 11
“Bottle service” is just a nice way of saying “we’re reserving this section for jackasses.”

March 17
The bagpipes are truly awful instruments. I think it’s why people drink so much on St Pat’s.

March 22
I hope we all can at least agree on this: Glenn Beck has been a boon to the chalkboard industry.

May 21
American Apparel is $91 million in debt. What’s that, like two t-shirts?

June 9
She said, “you’re pretty quiet off stage,” to which I replied, “I’m pretty quiet on stage, it’s just that I have a microphone.”

June 25
Local diner put an orange, parking ticket-sized flyer on my car. I taped a thank-you to their window the shape of a health code violation.

July 26 (a fun little game I started that day)
Exit line for Bravo TV’s new massage reality competition: “I’m sorry, you rubbed us the wrong way.”
Exit line for Bravo TV’s new bread baker reality competition : “I’m sorry, your bread did not rise to the occasion.”
Exit line for Bravo TV’s new bartending reality competition: “I’m sorry, we’re going to have to cut you off.”
Exit line for Bravo TV’s new barista reality competition: “I’m sorry, the cafe is for closers.”
Exit line for Bravo TV’s new furniture lacquering reality competition: “I’m sorry, you didn’t finish the job.”

Aug 3
My 1st post-college apartment was very crate & barrel, but only if you use the name literally.

Aug 27
Why are one-trick ponies a bad thing? It’s already a pony AND it knows a trick!

Sep 9
Had to explain to a friend that you don’t just ‘declare’ bankruptcy, there’s actually paperwork involved.

Oct 27
Hollywood horror films have no effect on me. If they really want to scare me they should make the film “Uninsured Abdominal Pain”

Dec 11
You can spell acid wash” without “ass” but you can’t say it.

Dec 18
Hangin with video golfers against my will ‘cuz I thought the sign said “Golden Tee nowhere” instead of “now here.” stupid bad spacing.

Dec 22
The Maya said the world ends in 2012 but they also thought the universe was a turtle so, you know, grain of salt.

© Paravonian